JamieJabber

Let’s talk marriage…and divorce

I don’t know if it’s just me or not but marriage seems to be a dying tradition.

To be honest, I’ve never known too many married couples especially black couples. I’ve only been to two weddings in my whole life and I’m 27 years old. The interesting thing is that I can’t tell you the amount of baby showers that I’ve been to.

I was never really the girl who always dreamed of getting married. Maybe because my mother wasn’t married and neither are any of my aunts so it was something that wasn’t “normal” for me to see. My mom always had a ” I don’t need a man for anything” attitude which rubbed of on me of course. In fact I hadn’t realized how much it did until getting into a serious relationship. I literally had to teach myself how to be more “submissive” and I’m not talking about in a demeaning way.

In my experience being married for 5 years, I’ve learned that marriage is hard. Marriage is a partnership. It’s being vulnerable and unselfish. I also have learned that you have to careful to not lose yourself in marriage. Again, Marriage is a partnership and both people in the marriage should be able to lean on each other and be confident in knowing that no matter what your spouse has your back through thick and thin. When I say don’t lose yourself I mean not to get lost in your spouses shadow. You can be a support system for someone and still pursue your own dreams and ambitions. Don’t let any one tell you different!

Thanks for stopping by!

With Love, as always,

JamieJabber

My 10 guilty pleasures

1. Reality tv

I don’t know what it is about reality TV but I can’t get enough

2. Chocolate

I consume chocolate in excess & it’s definitely not OK and is something I don’t plan on stopping.

3. Conversations with myself

I don’t know if this counts as a guilty pleasure or a little weird but I always have conversations with myself… like every day.

4. Kissing my kids excessively

I Understand that this might be a common guilty pleasure if it’s one at all. It’s just something about kissing my family that provides me with a great deal of comfort. It’s to the point where they push me away and stay clear of me but there’s no escaping me.

5. Flipping book pages

If you like to read you probably can definitely relate to this. There’s nothing like the feeling you get when you turn the page after reading. It’s like as the page turns I’m anticipating what’s on the next page and I’m excited to see where the story line is going.

6. Ice cream

Listen to me when I tell you this. I. Love. Ice cream. I don’t care how cold it is, I eat ice cream all year around. I actually had some earlier & I was shivering after I was finished. The satisfaction outweighs the suffering as always.

7. Hack videos/articles

I adore hacks! I can read/watch them all the time. If you ever want me to read or watch something just include hacks in the title.

8. Museums

Museums are so amazing. They are filled with so many awesome things. What I like about museums is that you can literally get lost for hours in the information and visuals.

9. Fun facts

I guess I love fun facts for the same reasons I like hacks. I love how random fun facts are.

10. Winding the bobbin on my sewing machine

You’ll get this if you are a sewer. If someone finds a job where you get paid to do this let me know lol!

What are some of your guilty pleasures? Do we share similar ones?

Thank for stopping by!

With love as always,

JamieJabber

UPCYCLE DIY EYEGLASS CASE

COST: FREE!!

I used two of the shirts that my husband gave me from and a free template from Pinterest for the case.

I cut out two pieces of fabric and three pieces of interfacing. I tried to make my own bias tape using the dark blue fabric (it was interesting to say the least & a slight fail).

Since the fabric was so similar on the right and wrong side I figured I would mark the wrong side so that I didn’t get confused. My simple ass didn’t realize that it would bleed through UGHHH!!! Also, the logo wasn’t centered which really bothered me. I sewed around the edges and a turned it right side out.

Attaching the dark blue fabric was challenging and looks a little sloppy and check out the logo all awkwardly placed and what not LOL. The purpose behind this d.i.y is to hold my sun glasses while they sit in my car or purse so the imperfections are ok. I will definitely try this again but with fusible fleece to make my life easier.

Let me know if you try this DIY and/or some suggestions that you have in the comment section!

Thanks for stopping by!

with love as always,

JamieJabber

DIY SLEEPING MASK.

Sleeping mask

cost: under 6 dollars. I just had to buy elastic because I used fabric from the DIY headphone case that I made and I purchased some fusible interfacing.

I found the pattern on Pinterest (there’s so many). I cut out two pieces of fabric and two pieces of interfacing to make it thicker. The next time I do this I’m going to uses a silk fabric and thinker fabric/lining for the inside.

Put the elastic on the mask to see how much of an opening is needed then sew it then turned it right side out, I used scissors to help push out the edges.

Let me know if you try this DIY or if you have any suggestions for me in the comment section!

DONE! My husband likes to sleep with the TV on so hopefully this helps!

Thanks for stopping by!

With love as always,

Jamiejabber

What I thought: Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes

Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. All opinions are my own.

So for 2020, I’ve decided to set a goal for myself to read 12 books, one for each month. January’s book is Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes

Wow. I loved this book!! Definitely very inspirational. I was reading What’s she reading? blog post where she listed 18 Best Book Deals which were all under $4.00. As soon as I saw the title I knew I had to read it. I paid $2.99 for the Amazon Kindle format. I love all of Shonda’s TGIT shows (Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal, Private Practice and How To Get Away with Murder) and I was hoping to get a glimpse inside of her head by reading Year of Yes. I love Shonda’s story telling abilities. To me, the overall message was about being courageous and taking control of your life and the choices that you make. Shonda shares with her readers her journey of stepping out of her comfort zone as she starts to say YES to the things that scare her. I am such a person of comfort and I need to say YES to more things in my life. I want 2020 to be all about me (in the most selfish/unselfish way). I want to become more comfortable with change. I want to take chances and invest in myself emotionally, physically and mentally. I definitely recommend this book to anyone looking for a relaxing and inspirational read.

now.. on to February’s book which will be Blood to Dust by L.J Shen and I am very curious to see what this book is about because it seems like it’s quite different from the other genres that I normally read…but I just said that I was trying to become more comfortable with change. Right?…

Thanks for Stopping by,

With Love as always,

JamieJabber

“Empowered women, empower women”

I was reading Becoming by Michelle Obama and she is talking about her experience at Princeton being one of very few African Americans on campus and it really got me to thinking about my own personal experience similar to hers.

I went to Canisius College here in Buffalo, NY. It’s a private college that is predominantly white. Michelle said that she spent 3 weeks on campus in the summer before the semester started to help her get acquainted to college life. I also spent about 3 weeks or so on campus before the semester started to get used to college. It was a requirement of the HEOP program that I was in. The group of us was made up of minorities with one Caucasian girl who ended up leaving before the summer program was over.

I remember vividly being the ONLY black girl in some of my classes & if we talked about slavery times I would feel super awkward! Almost as if everyone was looking at me even though they probably weren’t.

I remember taking a biology class that I found super hard but I just figured it was because I wasn’t smart enough until one day we were all outside of class talking about an upcoming test. I was really nervous and didn’t feel prepared. Then I over heard a group of white students talking about how easy the test would be because they had learned most of what we were learning in high school already. My high school barely touch the surface of what we needed for college. I had 3 different biology teachers in my senior year and at one point we didn’t have one. We had a substitute teacher sit in that just let us talk and play around. At the time I was happy about it. Being a careless high-schooler, I didn’t know how that would affect me later in life.

I realized that I would have to work harder on certain subjects to fill in the gap that had been created by simply not being able to get the best education growing up because of growing up in the hood, lack of money, and a lack of resources.

Even now I always feel like I have to prove myself to others. It’s not like I seek the approval of others but I like for it to be known that I can hold my own regardless of my skin color or gender. I’ve never used my skin color as a crutch, in fact, I think of it more as a cape that completes my superhero costume. Nonetheless, I had to work hard and not make excuses. Sometimes you have to be the loudest person rooting for yourself. Push yourself and truly know and believe that they sky is not the limit and you can accomplish what you set your mind to.

Thanks for Stopping by!

With love as always,

Jamie Jabber 💕

You never know…

You are not alone..

It’s not like I never believed in postpartum depression. I just never really understood it until it happened to me. I never understood how a woman can be sad in such a joyful moment. Then again, at the time I didn’t have any children so how could I understand?

When I had my son it was most definitely one of the happiest days of my life. Once I got home and the new excitement wore off and motherhood set in and it was a different story. I was still happy but I would find myself still being sad for what I thought was no reason. I mean I have this baby that I adore but I couldn’t shake the sadness.

I remember one time in particular. It was a nice day, actually it was a really nice day. I was sitting in the passenger seat and the whole time all I kept doing was pick myself apart in my head. I thought about EVERYTHING that I didn’t like about myself or my surroundings and fixated on it. I thought about it so long that I actually started to cry. I mean UGLY cry. My poor husband was so confused. After all, I was just fine moments before. He asked me what was wrong and I literally didn’t have a reason.

This happened on and off for a little bit. Then one day my husband said to me in a concerned but loving voice ” baby, I think you have symptoms of postpartum depression”. You know what’s funny about that? I’m the one who when to school for psychology and postpartum depression was something I had dismissed while I was pregnant. I genuinely thought that a mother HAD to hate or have negative feelings towards her baby to be diagnosed with postpartum depression. I LOVED my baby and actually felt happier while holding him. It was only when I wasn’t around the baby that I felt sad.

That night I though about what my husband said and decided to talk to my doctor. The doctor asked questions and agreed that I had symptoms of postpartum depression. She never fully gave me a diagnoses but wanted me to keep communication open with the doctors office and let them know if I felt worse in the coming days.

I felt better now that I had an idea of what was going on with me. I started to think about things that might be in my power to change that would help me during “down” times. I am a person that overthinks EVERYTHING so I had to actively distract or change my thought process at times.

Fortunately I had an AMAZING support system that kept me grounded. Over time I started to feel better and adjusted to motherhood. As woman we tend to overdo ourselves. We are AMAZING and our what are bodies can do is TRULY MAGICAL but that doesn’t mean that it’s all sprinkles and sunshine. It’s OK to admit that you are overwhelmed or just not yourself. It’s OK to take a step back to regroup. It’s OK to talk to someone about your feelings. You are NOT a failure or what ever else stupid labels society may put out there.

As always thanks for stopping by…

With LOOOVVEEE,

JamieJabber

Cherish your children ❤️

One day I was in the grocery store with my children (ages 2&4). They were making noises as kids do and I was busy trying to shush them while shopping. Which was and always is a trying task. For a brief moment I thought to myself “I hope that they aren’t disturbing people too much”. Then a random lady came up to me and said “the sounds that they are making are beautiful. I would love to hear that from my children again. They are all older now and I truly miss them being that little.” She told me to cherish those moments because I would definitely miss them when they get older.

Those words changed my whole shopping trip and thoughts. Now I try to cherish every moment even more with my children. I try to remember little things like the way they pronounce words, little facial gestures that they make, and so many other little things that I know will fade when they get older.

For moms and/or dads out there who find parenting stressful or feel like they can’t catch a break, I hope that this post brings some joy and is a reminder that you are doing a great job!

With love as always,

Jamie Jabber 💕

D.I.Y HEADPHONE CASE!

D.I.Y HEADPHONE CASE.

Cost: I used fat quarter squares from Walmart for this DIY. I LOVE fat quarter squares. They are fun, affordable and great for small beginner projects. The fat quarter squares that I used were $6.

I used two different fabrics (one for the outside and one for the lining), interfacing, and a zipper.

I traced around a glass using a fabric pencil to help me get my circle shape. I cut out three whole circles, 6 half circles and a square piece for the “tab” ( I ended up changing the fabric at the end). I didn’t measure anything I just eyed it (this is supposed to be fun right? *nervous laugh).

I cut the fabrics together with a rotary cutter and to make sure the interfacing was the same size as the fabric. I pinned down the fabric and cut around it. I folded the fabric in half and traced around it to get my half circles.

This is how I layered the fabric: Half circle right side up (lining fabric), zipper right side up, outer fabric wrong side up and then interfacing then I sewed where the pins are using 1/4 in seam allowance. I repeated this on the other side of the zipper.

Then I unfolded both sides and did a straight stitch down the inside (the pink stitching in the right picture). Then I pressed both sides to make it neater and smoother. Watch a YouTube video if you need to learn how to sew a zipper, I did!

This is what I was referring to when I said I picked a different fabric in the end. I cut out a square and folded it, pressed it and sewed down each ends.

Attaching the tab: I folded the tab in half and sewed it down. I also shortened the zipper before attaching the tab.

The back of the case: The left picture is how I put the fabric together and the right is after I attached it to the other side and sewed around the edge. I cut off the extra fabric to reduce bulkiness….

…..Turn right sides out and DONE! I can’t wait to put this to good use. My headphones get so tangled and stuck on things in my purse so sure this will help!! The tab is there just in case I want to add a key ring and attach it to my keys.

As always thanks for stopping by!!!

With Love,

JamieJabber